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Of course, there are some sad situations for which there's no solution. A plane ticket won't bring back your mom, and it won't transport you to that fuzzy memory in 1990 when everything was the merriest it's ever been. You're a three-dimensional person who will not feel happy about everything all the time, so there's no point in pretending you're not feeling longing or grief for people who are gone, Rubin says. Acknowledge these feelings, and try to remember those missing from your dinner table. "There are some things that will make you as unhappy for as long as you live," Rubin says, "But put it in the context of other things that are looking up."